Celebrity Sideshow: Shannon Dougherty's Left Eye

Ya da dunna dunna du du dunna...STEP RIGHT UP, FOLKS!



This is old news, but Shannon Dougherty's crazy left eye has always scared the shit out of me. Literally, I have nightmares about that eye. Why is it literally an inch higher than her other one? And why hasn't she addressed this in some way? Do you think she doesn't know? I mean, I have my own imperfections such as horrible eye bags that I've had since age 8 but shit, I'm not an actor with my mug plastered in front of millions of people. Come on, now... Anyway, I have never, ever, ever been able to pay attention to her in a scene because I just stare down that eye. It haunts me. Unfortunately, everyone I've told this to now has the same problem. Sorry, folks!

Lost Treasures: Kina's "Girl From The Gutter"

I reported on Cathy Dennis earlier and now I'd like to draw your attention to another under-the-radar artist: KINA. Remember her? Well, I sure didn't. Here's how she came back to me...

My friend Doug and I were having a cheap-white-wine fueled evening last night. On a side note, the evening began in a Chinese restaurant on the Upper West Side called The Cottage that provides FREE white wine with dinner. Check it out- we were cracking up because they don't even bother to ask you if you want the alcohol... the second you sit down they just throw it on your table. I am imagining them throwing free booze down for children and recovering alcoholics, I swear...

Anyway, we followed that with more cheap white wine at Therapy, when Kina's "Girl From The Gutter" circa 2000 came on. We both knew every word but couldn't remember the artist, and had to ask the staff. Since Kina completely fell off the face of the earth after GFTG, I'm sure she's somewhere in Detroit polishing off an eightball right now. But don't worry about all that and download this lost treasure today!

The Next Best Thing

yeah yeah yeah,
So Janice has a new reality show.

BUT

look what she says about her son and daughter, 18-year-old Nathan and 11-year-old Savannah.

"My son is also a producer on the show, telling me what's modern and what's hip with his generation, Savannah is all about volleyball and soccer and running around being a girl. She's everything I'm not"


HOLY CHASTITY BONO!
This show should be on Logo.
That's all I'm sayin'.

mariah massacres fiddy

It's official.

"The Emancipation of Mimi" not only garnered the #1 single of the year, "WBT", but has now surpassed 50 Cent's "The Massacre" as the #1 album of the year. Thanks to Christmas sales, "Mimi" now boasts 4.87 million units to "massacre's" 4.83.

Go shorty, it's ya birthday!

When contacted, Mariah was so excited she spilled her breakfast all over the floor ("no worries, the maid will clean it up").

I Don't Think You're Ready For This Jelly

OH. MY. GOD. The day is drawing near!!! fatpiggyboilinginthebath's new self-help book Shine: A Physical, Emotional & Spiritual Journey to Finding Love hits the stores on January 6th!!! I hope you guys didn't spend all your holiday money on trashy paperbacks and will have enough to get this epic masterpiece when it comes out. You can advance order it on Amazon for only $16.47!!! Here is a quote from the press release: "Star decided to make it happen. She began a personal journey to reconstitute her physical look, emotional state, and already strong spirituality. Even if she didn't find love, it would be a win-win situation because she'd emerge from the experience a healthier, happier woman -- one who could truly shine. Unless you live on another planet, you know Star succeeded in her quest and did find true love -- and it wasn't that hard at all. In Shine, she shares it all in her wise, revealing, irreverent, laugh-out-loud style." PRICELESS!!!




"I need a fish sandwich RIGHT NOW!!!"

Minnelli + Mayor Mike?

Somewhat randomly, Liza is set to sing at Mike Bloomberg's inauguration on New Year's Day. Regardless, I would still shoot a baby at point blank range to see Liza perform live, at ANY venue. I would pay to see Liza make a 10-second appearance at a Republican NRA Focus on the Family elderly and baby convention in Mississippi - that's all I'm saying.

And not to launch a flurry of nasty commentary, but I have to say I was kind of loving Mayor Mike during the recent transit strike ridiculousness. I'm not saying I'm pro -Mexicans -getting -arms -cut -off -in -meat -packing -plants, or anything. I'm overall pretty pro-union, but that shit was just ricockulous. Hi, I think I'll go ahead and cripple the economic superpower of America because of a few sticking points during my labor negotiations for a contract that expired FOUR DAYS AGO. How about, eat me raw? I hate the MTA too, but what they were offered was more than fair. As well, I think that some of the union reps recently invoking Rosa Parks' name (as in, this strike is similar to the civil rights struggles) during all this bickering is absolutely despicable. Oh Jesus...am I becoming a Republican? What is wrong with me??? Ok - so now let the hate mail commence.....

Outrageous...we're on a gluttony tour..

Ok, so my boyfriend and I just got back from a Royal Caribbean cruise to Mexico. Now, I can't say it was ever a goal of mine to go on a cruise. Besides an irrational fear of falling overboard and being ripped to shreds by sharks, I was under the impression that cruises were for trashy old people. Well, I got the second half right - there were in fact a lot of trashy people on our cruise, young and old alike. That said, it was fabulous. Cruises can be best described as Las Vegas on the water - but better. After a gut-busting breakfast buffet, you sit by the pool and binge on drinks all day, perhaps stumble into your stateroom in the afternoon for a nap, then head to an amazing four-course dinner, drinking and gambling, and late-night drinking (notice a theme here?) in the nightclub.

But what really sealed the deal on this experience was witnessing the MIDNIGHT BUFFET. Yes, a mere two hours after the second seating dinner has ended, the staff rolls out this ridiculous buffet full of poosty food like caviar and sushi (and yes, those pictures above I took are in fact of a chocolate elephant and Santa and his reindeer - I believe crafted out of pastry). After picture hour is over, a mob of gluttons literally stampede each other to eat all this shit. It is appalling...and hilarious. I thought when the food was gone they would start eating the effing table. So if you ever find yourself on a cruise and they serve a midnight buffet, take my advice and check it out...and send me your pictures!

Making A List...And Checking It Twice!

So...for those of you that don't know me, I obsess over year-end lists. This year is no different, and after much deliberation I have come up with My Top 10 Albums, Singles and Remixes for 2005:

Albums
1. Confessions On A Dance Floor, Madonna (Warner)
2. The Breakthrough, Mary J. Blige (Geffen)
3. First Time, Offer Nissim (Star 69)
4. Aerial, Kate Bush (Columbia)
5. The Emancipation of Mimi, Mariah Carey (Island)
6. The Understanding, Royksopp (Astralwerks)
7. Moonlight Serenade, Carly Simon (Columbia)
8. Libra, Toni Braxton (Blackground/Universal)
9. Fijacion Oral vol. I, Shakira (Epic)
10. Anniemal, Annie (Big Beat)

Honorable Mention: Guilty Pleasures, Barbra Streisand (Columbia), The Naked Truth, Lil' Kim (Atlantic), The First Lady, Faith Evans (Capitol)

Singles

1. "We Belong Together", Mariah Carey (Island)
2. "Hung Up", Madonna (Warner)
3. "Since U Been Gone", Kelly Clarkson (RCA)
4. "Don't Forget About Us", Mariah Carey (Island)
5. "I've Got A Life", The Eurythmics (RCA)
6. "Pon De Replay", Rihanna (SRP/Def Jam)
7. "Again", Faith Evans (Capitol)
8. "Boyfriend", Ashlee Simpson (Geffen)
9. "No", Shakira (Epic)
10. "Mr. Brightside", The Killers (Island)

Honorable Mention: "Cool", Gwen Stefani (Interscope), "Get Right", Jennifer Lopez (Epic), "Shake It Off", Mariah Carey (Island)

Remixes

1. "Home" (Offer Nissim Remix Part I), Suzanne Palmer (Star 69)
2. "We Belong Together" (Peter Rauhofer Reconstruction Mix Parts I & II), Mariah Carey (Island)
3. "Anything" (Mount Sinai Tribal Mix), Offer Nissim featuring Maya (Star 69)
4. "Gotta Go, Gotta Leave" (Junior Vasquez's 27th Street Mix), Vivian Green (Columbia)
5. "DirtyFilthy" (Original Mix), Superchumbo featuring Celeda (Twisted)
6. "What Happens Tomorrow" (Peter Rauhofer Reconstruction Mix), Duran Duran (Epic)
7. "I Believe" (Tracy Young & Gomi's Spiritual Mix), Chaka Khan (Sanctuary)
8. "Psykofuk" (DJ Dozia's Red Alert Mix) - Psykofuk (n/a)
9. "Heart Breaking" (Original Mix) - Offer Nissim featuring Maya (Star 69)
10. "It's All Good" (Scumfrog Mix) - Fantasia (RCA)

Honorable Mention: "Cater 2 U" (J Beck Mix), Destiny's Child (Columbia), "Hollaback Girl" (Gomi & Escape Mix), Gwen Stefani (Interscope), "Kinda New" (Tiefschwarz Dub), Spektrum (n/a)

Feel free to post your lists! And make sure to check out some of the stuff you are not familiar with. It was a good 2005 and I'm looking forward to an even better 2006.

Miss Seventeen

"I'm this many"No, she's not celebrating her birthday again,

she celebrating her 17th #1, "Don't Forget About Us".

She's now tied with Elvis, but still behind the beatles' 20.

Congrats Gurl!

karma chameleon

I love Jaime Pressly.

I first noticed her when I saw that Jerry Springer movie (in the theater! She was the only good thing about it.). Ever since, she's made bad movie after bad movie, but my hope and dream was that one day she'd find a role worthy of her comedic talents.
When I heard she was on "My Name is Earl", I groaned once again. The show sounded terrible, and Jason Lee looks heinous with that mustache and mullet, so I tried to keep my distance. Now I know I was wrong. This show is hilarious and brilliant. Jaime steals pretty much every scene she's in. NBC is now moving it to thier Thursday 9pm timeslot, and I urge you guys to watch it at least once. It's white trash humor at it's best (if that makes sense). Maybe I like it so much because I'm a Southern Bell and I actually know peeps like this, but whatevs, give it a try, for Jaime's sake.

Dress you up in my love

Go here and play dress up with your favorite celeb.

I like to dress mariah in hoochie ensembles.

MCMC

You know, it's just not Christmas until I listen to my MCMC.

I just loaded it into my iPod this morning and have been jolly all day.
Mimi's 1994 vocals are in top form, "AIWFCIY" is a modern classic,
and her version of "O Holy Night" is arguably the best ever recorded.
(plus she looks so darn cute in that santa suit.)
I luvit.

Satan Claus

Ok, I'm sure you all have seen this but the people that put this up are the newest cabinet heroes. These people who own some poosty brownstone in NYC have put this warped Santa Claus outside their home to protest the commercialization and secularization of Christmas. Dude, I don't care WHY it's out there - alls I know is that shit is awesome. If only this picture included some little girl with pigtails, staring at it and sobbing. "Mommy... what is Santa doing to Malibu Barbie????"

The Worstest Movie I Saw This Year

Hey kids! Time for a fun game that I like to call The Worstest Movie I Saw This Year. Surely, we've all been to (or rented) at least one total turkey in the past 342 days, and this is your opportunity to call it out. My heart is telling me to vote for the absolutely unmoving, totally BORING Nicole Kidman/Sean Penn "thriller" (and I use that term very, very loosely) 'The Interpreter' (Ouizer is with me on this one—it's a snooze), but my head is telling me to really go for the gusto and call out 'The Wedding Date.' You don't remember 'The Wedding Date'? Yeah, well, why would you? It came out in January, for starters. M'Boyfriend and I watched this one hungover Sunday afternoon with the aid of a lil' ====~~, thinking that it might actually be funny because it starred Debra Messing and the AWESOME Holland Taylor as her mother. (Can I get a shout-out for Holland? Anybody?

Well, it BLEW!, and if you look at the picture posted above, you'll see that even Debra Messing couldn't conjure up a funny face for the press photos. It didn't fail brilliantly on the level of the Ashley Judd classic 'Twisted'—really, nothing ever will—but it was unfunny, oddly paced, and totally pointless. Debra Messing hires a male 'escort' (played by Dermot Mulroney, who's done all this before) in an effort to placate her family, because otherwise she'd (God forbid) attend her snooty sister's wedding alone. Yeah, because that's just the WORSTEST THING EVER. Here's news for you: Attending a wedding solo ain't the worstest thing you could have done in 2005. That honor belongs to the practice of watching this wretched movie.

Um, what the EFF?!

The less I say, the better.

Konnichiwa, Mr. Harry-San!

Did anybody happen to catch Madge's two-part interview with Harry Smith on 'The Early Show' this week? Man, what IS it with Madge and that geekazoid? This is one of the many sit-downs she's had with ol' Harry in the past few years—I have been trying to figure out why she's so high on him, and all I can guess is that a.) CBS is part of Viacom, as is MTV...and Madge has been all up in their poonani with her new album, b.) Harry is a brainy geek and thus interesting/non-threatening to Madge, and c.) 'The Early Show' attracts an older viewer than either 'Today' or 'GMA,' and Madge needs to stay in touch with that audience if she's gonna be doing 'TRL,' too.

Now, that said...Madge was pretty well-behaved this go-round. She invited Harry to join her in Japan (HOT!!), where she made him practice his disco roll and totally dorked out by singing, 'Go Harry! Go Harry! Wave your hands in the air like you just don't care!' (Ouizer and I are always so shocked that the rest of the world doesn't seem to have caught on to the fact that Madonna is a MASSIVE DORK and not the bitchy a-hole everyone would like to believe that she is.) She also used big words like 'ephmeral' and 'ebullient.' (LOVING her for forcing the rest of the world to pick up a damn dictionary--you go, fellow word nerd!) But the best part of the entire interview was a quick clip they showed of Madge being interviewed by the local press, who were excited to see her in the well-chemical peeled flesh for the first time in 12 years. Somebody asked what she liked most about herself (a question that, back in the day, would have kept them there for 10 days), and she answered, 'My resiliency' before looking over at the female translator with a snotty look and asking, 'Does that translate? Resiliency?' in the most withering voice possible.

Ah, such charm...such charm!

Dropping Mad Knowledge

Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god. Joe Simpson and Felicia Culotta are going to be speaking at an event in Dallas next month for only $60! Who wants to come with me? I love, love LOVE to watch Papa Joe in action... I have a soft spot for the freak pervert svengalis, what can I say? What a freakin' train wreck...
And don't even TALK about Miss Felicia Culotta. She is the best friend/personal assistant (read: bitch) to the one and only Britty Spears. Fe has been through it all. Give this bitch a medal or something. Cacee Cobb has NOTHING on Fe.
I tried looking for a picture of Fe to no avail. If anyone can find one, pleeease tell me.

Squishy Face Jumpoff

There is really no point to this post. I just realized that Squishyface Zellweger had not been represented on this blog, and well, damned if I didn't find the squishiest face I could find of her on the internet. I'm going to withhold saying anything nasty about her because she managed to play Roxie in "Chicago" without me totally hating her. That said, I will say that I thought it was hilarious in Kathy Griffin's newest special when she referred to her as a "sweaty puffy cokewhore"... classic!

Morningwood Rocks!

I don't know who is on board with me, but Morningwood's song/video Nth Degree is my obsession of the moment (click here to check out the video). I feel like they are walking dangerously close to hipster-trash arena, but since they clearly have an awesome sense of humor (hi, band name? BRILLIANT) and can write a ridiculously catchy hook, all's clear. And that girl who fronts them is CLEARLY fabulous. I feel like this is the band that I wish Scissor Sisters were when people were freaking out about them (sorry - I'm not on that boat). In fact, I think this is the band the cabinet would form if we could all play instruments...no?

What, no love for Natasha B?

Ok, I get it...she's the brit sister of Daniel Bedingfield who's lost in a sea of American blonde pop singers/actresses/tabloid fodder. But trust me - her album is some seriously great pop music! And in her second single out now, "Unwritten", she's got the whole gospel choir + cheesy positive lyrics jumping off. What more could you ask for?

The Bobbsey Twins of Chelsea

Ok, I just had to post this because I stumbled across this pic of the two of them TOGETHER. Scott Nevins + Jai Rodriguez. Oh my god, I think I just threw up a little bit in my mouth... HEINOUS!!!!

Stop Doing That!

Tori, STOP doing that with your face. I seriously hope you didn't get plastic surgery to look like Nicollette Sheridan (aka my friend Shane) because a) it's not flattering, b) she will always be able to do it better and c) your mouth looks like a puckered anus.

Billboard Awards Recap

Billboard is hands down my favorite magazine, but I am having some issues with the people they let come to the Billboard Awards this year. First up...Carrot Top (sorry, I almost typed Tarrit Cords, those spiritual playing cards that God Warrior is so afraid of). Why did he get an invite and I didn't??? I'm sorry, but just looking at him makes me cringe.

Next up, my childhood idol Debbie...er Deborah Gibson. The last year I think she should have been invited was 1989 when people were still getting lost in her eyes. And I certainly wouldn't have let her in the door wearing that ensemble. (I'm still mad at Lil' Debbie for posing nude in Playboy last year. It is scarring to see someone like her naked when you treasure your fond memories of "Electric Youth").


And finally, the sight of Pamela Anderson and Marissa Jaret Winokur (of Hairspray fame) smashing their boobies together on the red carpet just leaves me absolutely speechless. Is that not one of the oddest things you've ever seen??? I still fail to comprehend. And while we are on the subject, why is Marissa wearing Pamela shoes and Pamela not wearing Pamela shoes? It is all a bizarre set of circumstances to me.

Also, the press backstage were absolutely bleak. When Beasty Carey finished posing with her FIVE awards, they booed her because she didn't stand there long enough (in her defense, carrying so many awards actually caused a minor injury since they are all pointy at the top). In response to the booing, Beasty whipped around and snapped, "That's not nice! You know I'm always very nice to you!" before throwing her hands in the air and exclaiming, "You can't please everybody all the time!" You tell 'em, Mimi!

Pop Specs!

I had to do a double take when I saw this photo because I seriously thought it was Patsy and Edina from AbFab! It is actually Ivana Trump and some socialite named Nikki Haskell demonstrating her new invention, the StarCruncher, "Fitness In A Bag". I can't even begin to comprehend the many levels on which life imitates art. No wonder I live in my own little fantasy world.

Not So Posh-a

Damn damn damn! I was lucky enough to score an invite to the grand opening of supposed new superclub Pacha on Wednesday, only to stand in line for half an hour in 20 degree frigid New York weather. Once inside, I quickly realized that the club was a big blow and that I didn't need to spend $15 on a watered down drink served by waitresses whose boobies were popping out of Mandee's deep-discounted crop tops. So...being the social-conscious New Yorker that I am, I high-tailed it out of there before being associated with trash like the girls below...

Of course, the next day I hear that I not only missed my alter-ego Jamie-Lynn Sigler (sigh, DiScala was much more to my liking), but I missed Miss Al Reynolds with two of her, uh, friends. Now where was FPGOMA (fat piggy grindin' on miss al) during all this??? I'm sure he told her he was running to the supermarket and high-tailed it over there before she could wrap herself up in 55 dead animal carcasses. Next time, I'll know to stick things out before making such haste decisions...

R.I.P, Pop Rocks :-(

And no, I am not talking about the 80's candy that exploded 'lil Mikey's stomach. I am talking about the uber-fabulous pop party that jumped around to about 50 venues downtown 2000-2004. Ah, such memories... blowing out with fresh-faced 18 year-olds to such classics as Milian's "AM to PM" (to which Shelby and the gender-bending DJ had a lip-sync off on the dance floor), Britty's Pepsi commercial (her best song to date, save "Toxic") and of course mounds and mounds of Xtina. People, pop music is my drug of choice! If anyone knows about this party finding a new venue, I beg of you to let me know. There is an enormous void in my heart that needs...to...be...FILLED (preferably with Kelly Clarkson's "Since U Been Gone", please).

Cabinet Glossary: New Word "BLEAK"

So, I was talking with Truvy last night about Mimi's fabulous use of the word "bleak", which I've decided to now incorporate in my own vernacular. So purpose 1 of this post is to formally propose to the cabinet that we adopt this word. At the same time, I thought I might put together a useful glossary of other common cabinet terminology, along with an example to help with context:

Blown - "That outfit Lara-Flynn Boyle is wearing is BLOWN!"

Heinous - Unacceptable. (This one is Ouzier's specialty) This actually cannot be used in a sentence - only in reaction to something severely unpleasant, i.e. Carrie Underwear in a Sketchers ad. "HEINOUS!"

Schnitzel - Nose candy. "I heard Mary-Kate accused Lindsay Lohan of stealing all her schnitzel."

Rage - Party hard. "AAAAAA! Tonight I just want to get some schnitzel, listen to pop music, and RAGE!"

Jumpoff - A fun word to tag to an end of a phrase, with no standard meaning. "What was up with that jesus jumpoff on Trading Spouses?"

I think those are the standards. Please feel free to jump in with others!

Julia Demato's Nose Candy "Misunderstanding"

In more where-are-they-now news, American Idol 2 also-ran Julia Demato got busted over the weekend for a DUI, with a side of pot and cocaine possession. Nothin' like that standard triumvirate to fuck a gurl up. Fortunately, she says "This was just a misunderstanding. It's going to be taken care of in court, and that's that." Whew! Thanks for clearin' that one up!

no no no noooooo way!

Liz Smith confirms today that "Dreamgirls" the movie is currently underway. Casting includes J Hud as Effie; with Jamie Foxx, Eddie Murphy, and Beyonce in supporting roles.
HOLLA!

Project Bitchfest: Season 2

OMG, finally!
Project Runway starts up again tonight @ 10pm with a 2-hour premiere.
Linda Staci gave it a 4-star review this morning, so I'm now extra excited.
True, there's no Wendy Pepper this season, but I read that all but one guy is gay, so there's sure to be PLENTY of outrageously snide comments.

I'll take that as a compliment!

I just finished watching Chicklet-teeth Underwood Ms. Redstate on the Billboard Music Awards singing some HEINOUS song with a horrible chorus and bridge consisting of like, four long American-Idol style notes. Hearing those unnecessary notes that in no way fit with the rest of the song reminded me of this 'lil blowout...American Idol Season 3's Diana Degarmo! What the cabinet loved about her was that no matter how horrible the criticism, she'd pipe back, "I'll take that as a compliment!". We extended the concept even further to her lackluster debut:

"Diana, your debut cd sucks and literally no one but your mother has bought it - and she got it in the 99-cent bin at Wal-Mart."

"Thanks - I'll take your complete lack of interest as a compliment!"

God bless 'er. Here's hoping that you never get jaded like us and you are able to maintain your relentless, crazed optimism.

If Madonna calls...

I stole this from Pink.
Hilarious!

You and me Diddy... wassup Diddy

Anybody out there keeping up with Making the Band 3?? (cue the sound of crickets chirping)
Okay, I know many of you aren't watching this gem of a t.v. show but YOU SHOULD BE. I LOVE LOVE LOVE it. You got your crazy ass "choreographer" Laurie Ann who just can't stop making the girls dance to that goddamn Ciara track. You got your nubian princesses with all the right names (Taquita, Wanita, Denosh, etc.). You got your Diddy - king asshole of them all.
For those of you that missed the episode when Dominique BLEW HER TITS OFF, you missed out on one of the top 5 moments in 2005 T.V. She is a baby Deborah Cox. You like that! Ahh.. enjoy them while the show is on because even if they are made into an actual band, they'll never go anywhere. We all know Diddy has A.D.D. when it comes to girl bands (R.I.P. Dream).

oh she think she cute.

Mekhi Phifer invites a skanky white girl

to his B-day party,

and the sista's are not amused!

Nicole has a cal-fest

BTW, TAB makes an energy drink?!?!

I WANNIT!

In Defense of RENT...

I don’t understand why the movie version of “Rent” is being crucified to the extent that it is. “Rent” is not “Boat Trip”. It is not “Uptown Girls”. It is not any movie starring Ashton Kutcher. It is undoubtedly flawed, as the stage work was flawed, but I can’t believe that people are able to hate a movie that so often is beautiful and inspiring.

I guess I am biased, because I have always had an emotional connection to this work. When this show came out when I was 18 years old, it literally changed my life. At that time, I was just beginning my process of coming out. Same story you all know - gay child growing up in heartland America…I felt like I had been dropped off a ship by aliens. When I first heard the music to this show, I connected in a major way. Here were these characters who fully embraced their “otherness”, even put it on a pedestal. And to see this show explode into the mainstream as it did, well… it helped me realize that the best times were ahead of me. I knew for sure that there would come a time when I too could move to New York and make my own special family of freaks like me.

Going to see the movie, I was skeptical I would have the same emotional reaction. I was far from the feeling of being 18 and drowning, and also so much of the subject matter seemed hopelessly dated. What I pleasantly discovered was that I connected to the material even more – only for different reasons. I love that despite all of the horrible things happening to these characters, they remain hopelessly optimistic, choosing to value life and love more than ever. It made me think of how I felt after the passing of one of my friends several years ago, or how I felt during those miserable months after 9/11. It’s during those confusing, shitty times that we all go through that we're forced to make the same decision these characters were forced to make. Do I want to live, or do I want to die? Well, while those of you who know me might laugh at this statement, like Mimi, Roger, Mark, Maureen, Joanne, Tom and Angel, and all the rest – I am trying my very best to do the former - to laugh, to love, and to live for now. So the next time you hear someone say something nasty about "Rent", feel very sorry for them – they obviously missed the point entirely.

'90s Flashback

I just noticed that Monica Lewinsky has not yet appeared on this blog. Now, I have been very public about my love for this woman from the moment Matt Drudge (bless him) broke this story back in '98 (we'll ne'er get those days back). I was thinking about Monica because I got to catch up with one of my bff's Floben (this is, of course, a nickname) in L.A. this week. Floben and I met in college and bonded over our mutual love for Monica. We have also bonded throughout the past 7 years over the following:
- Britney's Pepsi Commercial
- Brit's "Oops, I Did It Again" choreography (which we performed once in the middle of a Las Vegas casino when the song spontaneously started playing)
- "Crybaby" by Jamie Lynn Sigler
- pop songs by Hoku (Don Ho's daughter)
- The "Sophie" episode of Sweet Sixteen on MTV
Love ya Floben and have fun reading "Read Your Blog, Shelby" while faking the busy at work :)

daughter to father

Check out La Lohan's new album promo pics.
Very nice.

Pink Flamingos

I love the look, but her hair reminds me of Divine.

Outrageous Xtina honeymoon pics...

Drink the juice, Christina!

Oh my god, I am so bored...shouldn't I be in the studio?


Ah, so in love...

Is Brit-Brit Fed up?

Really, I just wanted an excuse to post this outrageous picture. I hadn't seen this before - does anyone know what the shoot was for? Anyway, the rumor is (and as Kathy Griffin says, if it's a rumor then it's good enough for me) that she booted K-Fed out and fired two security guards because they had a pot dealer in the house. Looking forward to reading all about it in the next issue of the best magazine on earth, In Touch!