My Xmas Wishlist

It's hard for poor old Ouizer to believe that I've been working in the entertainment industry for over five years now. Five years ago, I landed a sweet job at my favorite record label, and soon thereafter began to wreak havoc on the 'normalcy' of my coworkers. At first quiet and unassuming, I soon became known for being able to freely recreate choreography for then-current videos like Madonna's "Music" and Toni Braxton's "He Wasn't Man Enough". Come Xmastime, my closest work colleagues decided we should trade holiday gifts and asked me what I wanted for Xmas. I suppose they thought I'd answer, "Oh, a gift certificate to Tower Records or a nice cashmere scarf from Banana Republic." You see, they were just getting to know how...well, odd I was. Without a flick of the hair I replied, "The new BEYONCE doll, of course!"

Now, I didn't think they'd actually do it. But, come December 23rd, there in Barbie-covered wrapping paper, was my very own B doll in the outfit she had worn in the "Survivor" video. I cherished my Beyonce doll, never taking her out of the box and worshipping her daily.

A few years later, I had the chance to work on a Destiny's Child marketing campaign. I lovingly took Miss B from her pedestal and brought her to work, placing her in front of my 2'x2' promo flats and stacks of promos, postcards and giveaways. My layout, of course, was perfectly positioned, worthy of Simon Doonan's Barney's displays or even Bree VanDeKamp's kitchen cabinets.

Fast-forward to 2006. As we reach the final stretch of the Dreamgirls premiere onslaught, I am filled with wonder. This morning, that same boss from my first entertainment job forwarded me an e-mail titled "Want This For Xmas?" And...lo and behold, it seems like everything comes around again. I have not one Beyonce doll to look forward to, but a slew of her, as well as some Anika Nonis and a few J Huds thrown in for good measure. The Gods must be looking out for Ouizer in her old age, and all I want for Xmas is....ALL OF THESE! Click on the title of this post for the full selection of HOT MESSES! LUVSIT!